I won’t dance, don’t ask me.

I slip on my high heels, fluff down my new dress, and take one last knowing look in the mirror.  I have to walk for a moment in my heels; wondering how freely they’ll allow me to spin.

When dancing is a key component of an event (wedding, milestone anniversary, milestone birthday), people often fall into three categories:

  1. They immediately denounce it.
  2. They might get up for a cliché song or two (I won’t get into this).
  3.  It’s the ultimate goal to end up dancing all night.

The first category usually decides “I’m too awkward to dance.” “I don’t like the music.” (it’s usually awful), or the inarguable: “I just don’t like dancing.”  But I have to present an argument for at least the “too awkward” person.

Dancing is for many “the awkward person”.

I’m not by any means a professional dancer.  Unless dancing in your bedroom for many, many lonely middle school/high school years counts. I’m a moderately successful hair flipper, which can create the illusion of great dancing.  I’ve spent a lot of time memorizing the flow of greats like Gene KellyDonald O’Connor, Danny Kaye, and Vera-Ellen.  Did it translate without professional instruction? Definitely not.  But I like to pretend, and I think that’s where I’m trying to direct this discussion.

I fall into the third category.  Dancing is my ultimate goal, pretending is my thing.  And if I can shut down at what are usually very social events, and disappear? Well, how perfect.  With every swish of my dress I gracefully (depending on how much I’ve had to drink) avoid small talk.  There are no lengthy conversations about careers.   While others suffer through, “So how have you been?” I can twist and slide around a dance floor, smile at someone doing the same, and we’re good.

So if you’re the one who doesn’t dance simply because you feel awkward? I’d like to persuade you (without being that annoying person begging you to dance) to remember, we might be a lot more awkward than you think.

We just have an angle.


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